Friday, July 25, 2008

I'm here & it's now - tomorrow.

Warhol, Andy
I'm going to live life to the fullest because i'm here and it's now.
or
I'm going to strive hard now because I want a better future.

To live in the moment or to live for tomorrow? I really can't get my head around into incorporating them both without a slight case of hyterics. It's always really one or the other for me. It depends on the day, the weather, the way the sun peaked into the blinds (or didn't), the way a song or a photograph shocked my senses. It all really depends. I'm picking my brain here. So many questions; it really is like being in a hall with a thousand soft mumurs. --- just trying to focus on one. How can I live my life the way I want to without interferring with the way I...well the stable path. When you think about living in the now, do you think about the consequences? When you think about your dream life many of the essentials of your life now are pretty much non-existant, but you look past it or you just can't see it through the bedazzled smoke screen. But then there are responsibilities, so on and so forth, and then the "you know what, just fuck it" persona emerges. The inconsistency is rather annoying. Can you honestly alternate as a workaholic and a freewheeler in middle class america? If I work work work now I could possibly kiss the middle class goodbye and say hello to posh town houses, but then i'd be a "freewheelin'" 30 or 40 something year old. I want to be in the now, but I don't want to be stuck in the now tomorrow.

KELCIE

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Postsecret.blogspot.com


I am a self-confessed slave to Postsecret Sunday. A rather willingly slave at that. It's just a whole bundle of humorous, loving, sickening, eye-opening, and epiphany-provoking goodness I just can't keep my hands off of. When my scroll reaches its final inch I always wonder what secret I would send over or if I should do it at all. I'm not saying I have a bag full of secrets I could randomly pull out of, but there are - --some. Having secrets is healthy I suppose. "We are mysterious creatures" - Evening. Without secrets where's the mystery, the "round' characters literary critics are always on the look out for in the human specimen? I like mystery. It's intriguing. But will exposing my secrets, although in anonymity, relinquish that mystery in me? I don't think i'm looking for redemption, forgiveness, or any of the sort specifically because of the secrets I hold. Do those people post their secrets to get it off their chest or simply for shock value? I'd like to think both.

KELCIE